Small Victories

Hello handbag! Today was the first day that I could carry my purse on my shoulder without it hurting. This is a small victory and I am taking back everything I've ever said about men and their cargo pants. I am taking back everything I've ever said about men who leave all their change in the cup holder in the car. Life without a purse makes it hard to be organized and all those pockets and cup holders become functional if you don't carry a murse or a purse. I was happy to transfer all my drink splattered crusty coins into my actual wallet.

My handbag and I went on a field trip to see our boyfriend Dr. Grant at Baylor Dallas. I learned that I will never again need a mammogram, a sonogram or an MRI of my breasts. Oh that's right, because I don't have any. Instead, I will come in for regular quickie feel-ups from Dr. Grant. I guess he will be my boyfriend for life. There is only a small, small chance of any kind of cancer returning in the chest area - if it did, it would be in the tissue and that they can only detect by the feel up method.

Dr. Grant reports that everything is healing nicely - the radiated skin tissue from C1 is behaving very nicely. I have pretty much full range of motion with both of my shoulders. Physical Therapy has worked wonders. Today I felt really physically GREAT for the first time since my surgery. But still, not cleared to work out - no jumping, no bouncing, no messing with the still open wound. No swimming, no walking outside but I can go walk in the mall or someplace air conditioned. No to the treadmill in the gym. He was a little too Dr. No No for me today but I am complying and I am not complaining.

If you are thinking of not working out because you're not motivated, please go do a workout for me. Trust me, if you couldn't do it, you would want it.

Today's silver linings:

Carrying a purse the old fashioned way!

No more mammograms!! But this does NOT, and I repeat DOES NOT, excuse you from getting yours.

Follow, follow, follow, follow, follow the yellow brick road

Clicking the heels and one step closer to home this week. Yesterday we had the first follow up appointment with Dr. McSmarty (girls, let's face it - it's better to have a smart one than a pretty one), the Plastic Surgeon. He looked at how I was healing and said AWESOME...the radiated breast is acting like a radiated breast - those 40 treatments of heavy dose radiation 9.5 years ago in C1, has made that skin difficult to work with - but not impossible!

The two drains I had on either side of me were removed and it didn't hurt a bit, although it was weird because they were snaked around the entire breast area and the tube was much larger than I expected it to be. FREEDOM! Having those pesky things removed is a huge step in recovery and mobility.

He added 100 ccs of saline into each breast. We'll do this one or two more times, and then there is an exchange surgery to put the implant in. There's a new Gummy Bear implant that they are using - thanks John and Clare on the heads up about that. Yes, it feels like a gummybear. Sure, you can touch them when they're in - I won't feel a thing!!

I am feeling some tightness across the breast area from the new saline expanding my skin. However, I'm off painkillers completely and moving to Advil. You know what that means? YES. I enjoyed my first glass of post surgery wine. Ahhhh

No news on the nodes - so keep up the prayers and chanting. The breast surgeon has not called me about the results. The plastic surgeon didn't have them and I am seeing them both next Thursday. If they don't call me, I'm not calling them. I'll just find out next week and enjoy my drain-free life right now. If I have to do additional chemotherapy, they will not put in the gummy bears until I'm finished with that.

So my fellow Texans, is it HOT OR WHAT? I can't wait until I'm able to get out and about exercising but in the mean time, we decided we needed a pool so that project starts NOW. Swimming will be great therapy and a great way to beat the heat. And maybe we can more easily lure you out to see us.

Silver Linings:

Driving!

Wine!

Return to normalcy, if only for awhile. Pete heads back to work on Monday.

The Price of Pre-Admission

Yesterday was my pre-admission to Baylor Spa (as my friend Dave so named it). This is reviewing all paperwork, insurance information and making sure you are medically able to withstand surgery. I had to give a little blood and have an EKG. All systems are go! I also had to fill out MORE PAPERWORK. NO. I AM NOT PREGNANT for the 15th time. And the funny question: Are you going through any major life issues right now? HELL-O. I'm pre-admitting for surgery to remove my breasts. I'd say that is pretty major life!!

I felt really good after this appointment. The nurse who checked me in is an 18 year breast cancer survivor. She sees my plastic surgeon (on the side, of course, right now he's mine!). Apparently, he is the greatest and I always put a lot of credence with the nurses because, well...'nuf said. She was also reassuring that I would be fine since I'm young (!) and healthy. I love Baylor Dallas, not because of the forms, but because they really have caring people working there who will tell you you are young. Oh, and they're smart too!!

OK - here's the surgery details (drum roll please):

My surgery takes place July 6 at Baylor Dallas at 9 am (or as we affectionately call it in Dallas - BIG BAYLOR. They have many satellite facilities). I will be in the Roberts Building. Pete and I have to be there at 7:30 am. I will be in surgery for 6-7 hours depending upon how much fun they are having. I will stay in the hospital 1-2 days and will not know about additional treatment needed until after they review my tissue and sentinel node biopsy (to know if the cancer has spread through the nodes). KEEP CHANTING: NO NODES NO NODES NO NODES.

Pete is taking a couple of weeks of Family and Medical Leave (thank you Apple) to take care of me (thank you Pete!).

So many of you have asked, what do we need? Should you come to the hospital? Cook for us? Send flowers?

The short answer is we're blessed to have so many wonderful people in our lives - the outpouring of support has been amazing. But I still bring it back to those who don't have this kind of support. So I'll tell you where my head is and then if I change my mind (because we women are awesome like that) I will let you know.

Visits: I'd probably prefer you didn't visit me in the hospital. I will be at my worst during the first two days. Pete said he is perfectly fine sitting in the waiting room catching up on Words with Friends, Angry Birds and the stack of books he has neglected as a result of aforementioned habits. If you want to check in with Pete for any updates - his email is hangdog@earthlink.net; you can text or call him at 9723457229. I'm not sure he can answer phone calls. He reports that he doesn't need company while waiting.

Once, I'm recovered enough to feel human, I believe that I will want some company to go take a walk with me or talk to me. Stand by. I will continue to blog even if it's a fuzzy call for "COME SEE ME." Pete may make a guest blog appearance.

Flowers: I won't be at the hospital long, so sending flowers there will only mean Pete has to transport grouchy old me home and the flowers. Once we get home, not being able to take care of them and getting aggravated at Pete for not taking care of them and him getting aggravated at me because honestly taking care of me is enough = save your money!

Food: Honestly, it's just Pete and I. One of Pete's best qualities is that he is an amazing cook. He knows my eating habits. So I'm saying - please don't but if you feel compelled to make something, coordinate with Pete. I don't want you to make anything we wouldn't eat or use. I know cooking is an act of love.

So what can you do for me right now?

Most of you know that my passion lies with Komen Dallas because of all the help we give women and families in our community affected by breast cancer. Women who don't have a choice about procedures or doctors or have to take the bus to get to their mastectomy appointment.

SUPPORT THE WAR IN MY RACK! Join my team and walk, run, crawl, sleep in for the cure - October 15, 2011...I will be there regardless of what I'm going through. These are my people!

Sign up: http://dallas.info-komen.org/goto/MyRack

Donate: http://dallas.info-komen.org/goto/TSwain

Silver linings and the Price of Pre-Admission:

BLING!!! During C1 and the bald headed chemo look, a friend suggested that I get diamond earrings to shine brightly around my bald head. I did and to this day I love them and what they stood for.

In remembrance of C2 and turning 50 and not buying the BMW, I did a little swing over to North Park Center (home of the Komen Dallas Race for the Cure) and got a little blue box from Tiffany's... a beautiful yellow diamond from Australia. It will arrive when I arrive home from the hospital. Ok, so that's a yellow lining.